


Sexy Batman

by Hormonal_Trashbag



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Apartment Building Romance, Awkward Conversations, F/M, Walk Of Shame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-01
Updated: 2017-02-01
Packaged: 2018-09-21 09:43:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9541988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hormonal_Trashbag/pseuds/Hormonal_Trashbag
Summary: Rey unlocked the door to her building blindly, relieved to finally be out of the blaring, morning sun and in a place she could comfortably ease out of her heels. It was Sunday, a day that people were meant to sleep in, so she did not anticipate having to wait for the elevator with another tenant. She certainly didn’t expect someone else to be making the walk of shame.Yet, as she stooped down to grab her pumps, she met one-on-one with a pair of large dress shoes, attached to appropriately long legs.





	

**Author's Note:**

> THIS IS DUMB OK

Rey unlocked the door to her building blindly, relieved to finally be out of the blaring, morning sun and in a place she could comfortably ease out of her heels. It was Sunday, a day that people were meant to sleep in, so she did not anticipate having to wait for the elevator with another tenant. She certainly didn’t expect someone else to be making the walk of shame.

Yet, as she stooped down to grab her pumps, she met one-on-one with a pair of large dress shoes, attached to appropriately long legs.

Rey straightened her back and nearly swore--it was Sexy Batman, proudly named by Poe. He was propped against the wall, elevator button glowing across from him, his hair tangled and his oxford rumpled, as if it had spent all night crumpled on the floor.

She gnawed on the inside of her cheek, quickly glancing down at herself to realize she hardly fared better, her dress wrinkled and her hair thrown up haphazardly.

Sexy Batman looked at her innocently before glancing up to the ceiling with an impatient frown, as if glaring at the elevator would cause it to move faster.

He knew. He _had_ to. Rey wished the floor would open up and swallow her whole.

How mortifying. Sexy Batman was never supposed to see her like _this;_  stumbling home in what she wore last night, hungover and regretting the one-night-stand that hadn’t been worth the trouble. She hadn’t even brushed her teeth yet. She hadn’t had coffee yet. She was barely human.

He cleared his throat to murmur, “Good morning.”

Rey knew he was just trying to ease some of the tension. She forced a smile that neither of them bought.

“Hi.”

The elevator dinged and the doors slid open and Rey had never seen such relief on a man’s face before. He pushed away from the wall and hurried inside, her padding after him in her bare feet.

“What floor?” he asked.

“Seven.”

He hit the seven and nine buttons, leaning against the rail as the doors shut.

Slowly, they lifted.  
He smelled faintly of stale cologne and women’s deodorant. She amused herself with the idea that he had borrowed it from whoever he had spent the night with. At least they were in the same boat.

Rey watched from the corner of her eye as he ran a hand through his tousled, slept-on hair.

“I, uh, like your dress,” Sexy Batman ventured to say.

_Why in the hell was he trying to start a conversation with her? Wasn’t this awkward enough?!_

She exhaled. “Thanks.”

Sadly, this was perhaps the longest conversation she’s ever had with him, and all she could manage was one-worded responses. Rey found herself willing the elevator to move more quickly, too.

Her phone buzzed in her purse and she was so surprised she nearly dropped her shoes. Rey frantically dug through the small bag, relieved to see a grinning Poe on her screen. She barrelled out of the elevator the moment it reached her floor, sparing Sexy Batman a last, humiliated look before the doors were closing and he was out of sight.

She answered her phone as she trudged to her apartment. “Oh my god, you will not believe what just happened.”

“Is that a good ‘oh my god’ or a bad one?”

Rey slumped onto the floor, back against the front door as she moaned.

“Bad one, then,” he muttered. “What happened, sweetheart?”

“Sexy Batman!” she exclaimed. “He was waiting for the elevator when I got in--”

“Ooh,” he interrupted, and she could hear the smirk he wore, “you didn’t get home until this morning? Has little Rey been a naughty girl?”

Rey slammed her head against the door, letting out a frustrated growl.

“That isn’t the point! I got kicked out of some prick’s house after _not_ getting to come last night,” he made a cringing noise, “looking like a total wreck, and there Sexy Batman is! Standing there! All sexed-up! I’ve barely spoken to him before, and now he’s going to think--”

“You were both sexed-up? Rey, it might be a _sign._ Do you think Sexy Batman’s the one?”

“Knock it off!” she snapped, burying her face in her knees. “God, I was so rude to him, too. He’s never going to try to talk to me again... _you_ know how I am before I get my coffee, and--”

A gentle knock at her door momentarily silenced her.

“--Poe, I have to call you back,” she mumbled.

He had no time to protest. She ended the call promptly, rolling away from the door to stand, opening it to find none other than Sexy Batman outside her apartment, cheeks flushed and a tube of lipstick in his open palm.

The lipstick was hers, she had worn it the previous night and must have dropped it from her purse while grabbing her phone, and he had kindly come back down to her floor to return it. Rey opened her mouth before clamping it shut once more. Muted, she reached to take the tube, her own face hot with embarrassment.

“I didn’t have a great night either,” he said, his tone sheepish as if he were trying to even the playing field. Sexy Batman must have overheard her yelling at Poe on the phone and had undoubtedly found her apartment that way, meaning, of course, that he knew about the embarrassing nickname she had for him and more about her dismal sex life than her apartment building crush should.

Just when she thought the situation could not get any more excruciating, the world had to prove her wrong.

He continued, rambling under the weight of her shocked stare. “I’m pretty sure she was on something because she kept trying to suck on my toe, which is really...weird...and I’m making this even more uncomfortable than it already was,” he sighed, defeated.

Rey deflated, guilty now. He was just trying to make her feel better.

“When I woke up this morning, he asked me what I was still doing there.”

He winced. “Okay, you win. That’s way worse than toe-sucking.”

She offered a morose, self-depreciating laugh.

He bit his lip, jutting his hand out. “I’m Ben.”

“Rey,” she whispered back, hesitantly taking his hand. Finally, she had a name to attach to the face, and it was a lovely name. More importantly, it was a name he wouldn’t have given unless he planned to give her an opportunity to use it.

When she dared to meet his gaze, he beamed down at her, a dimple forming in his cheek.

This man would spell her doom, Rey was convinced. With just a smile he had warmth spreading through her limbs.

“Do you want to go out for coffee?”

Would she ever.

**Author's Note:**

> I am ashamed. But this was loads of fun to write.


End file.
